Copied from a response to Wade Burleson’s “Grace and Truth to You” blog, under the blog post entitled “Patriarchy and the Family Integrated Church Emphasis in SBC Seminaries:  A Potential Embarassment for the SBC“:

Anonymous peaceofchange said…
My husband is a former SBC church planter and pastor. He was educated in SBC schools and seminaries and upon graduation served with NAMB for two years and stayed with the church plant as pastor. We were in a Northern State and it was very difficult to plant in this area. We went to an FIC conference in Wake Forest, NC because a professor who taught at the seminary which my husband graduated from was one of the speakers. We trusted him and decided that FIC must be worth looking into because of what we knew of him. It was there that we met another pastor and we told him of our difficulties we had in our church and he and another well known FIC guy began to explain to us why we were having these problems…because we were not family integrated. We weren’t doing it the way God intended it to be done. He who encouraged us to come to his city and start a FIC church alongside his church. We agreed along with another to go to this city. Long story short, we found ourselves destitute and homeless…the pastor had lied (we have since found out that we are not the only family that he has done this to) My husband contacted the SBC powers that be, and he was told that he should know that SBC churches are autonomous and that they cannot say or do anything about a SBC church…they told him to get it together financially and then they would talk to him. We had fallen out of grace with these people because our finances were shot….all because of a SBC pastor.

I have given you no real details, but the spiritual abuse in this situation was horrible. We began to move in and out of FIC circles in our new area because these were the “right” people. We soon found out that we wanted no part of this movement. It almost destroyed our faith in God, our marriage and our family.

I don’t know how long recovery will last. Survival came first, then anger, then grief…now I feel like we are just existing. My husband was “called” to ministry….right? Cindy and her writings have been very beneficial and healing for me. I recommend that anyone who has experienced spiritual abuse to check out her sight…Under Much Grace.

Again, thanks for writing about this topic. I believe the landscape of America will be littered with lay people and clergy alike who will be left to die by these people. It is well worth discussing.

Sat Sep 06, 04:12:00 PM 2008

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